Dialogue: on that day my spirit left my body and I went with these two to my mother and my sister. I cannot remember why. I was unconscious. Tra bih Gogh told me a few weeks later. He was here. He slept on the couch. The next day Graham took me to the hospital in his station wagon. I cannot remember changing into pyjamas at the hospital. I remember first being in one ward and then being moved to another. I do not remember much of the first ward. It disappeared in the pulp of my head. Different people tell me different things. Like Tengani and Jabulani visited me and I told them about being in a veldt of flowers. I cannot remember them visiting me. I looked at my hand when I regained consciousness, when I regained myself, and it felt utterly strange. I felt utterly strange to myself, as if I was no longer real. I have forgotten so much, so many people’s names, the memories poured out of the burst vein.


One day my mother and my father was there for me. The old one’s. They came for me. I was so moved. How many decades of cropped up things to say. But they just wanted me to be normal again, when I was still half in the shady world.